The WTF? Worst Films Extravaganza Presents: Batman and Robin (1997)

DIRECTED BY
Joel Schumacher

STARRING
George Clooney - Bruce Wayne/Batman
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Victor Fries/Mr. Freeze
Chris O'Donnell - Dick Grayson/Robin
Uma Thurman - Dr. Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy
Alicia Silverstone - Barbara Wilson/Batgirl
Michael Gough - Alfred Pennyworth
Jeep Swenson - Bane
Elle MacPherson - Julie Madison
John Glover - Dr. Jason Woodrue
Pat Hingle - Commissioner Gordon

Genre - Action/Adventure/Fantasy/Science Fiction/Comic Books

Running Time - 125 Minutes


Even though the 1960s were very kind to the character in terms of the mainstream audience, Tim Burton turned DC Comics' The Caped Crusader into a pop culture icon and merchandise machine with 1989's BATMAN and 1992's BATMAN RETURNS. Both films were commercially and critically successful, proving that films adapted from comic books could be a great commodity for any film studio if done right and with respect to its source and to its fan base. While BATMAN was a huge blockbuster success, BATMAN RETURNS was less so, even though it was a stronger and still successful film. Warner Brothers, who owned the rights, felt that BATMAN RETURNS was too dark of a film [even though it reflected the 1990s version of Batman]. So they dumped Tim Burton as director and hired more glossy and stylish director, Joel Schumacher, instead. Michael Keaton was out in the process, as well as a planned CATWOMAN feature starring Michelle Pfeiffer. But Warner Brothers was happy with the changes, hoping that the new status quo would appeal to a larger, family friendly audience.

In 1995, BATMAN FOREVER was released to audiences. It had A-list stars, such as Val Kilmer [Batman], Chris O'Donnell [Robin], Nicole Kidman, Tommy Lee Jones [Two-Face], and especially Jim Carrey [The Riddler], taking on iconic roles that many fans were eager to see on the big screen for the first time. While the film was not as critically received as the previous two installments, BATMAN FOREVER was a huge financial success - making over $300 million domestically alone and having a very popular soundtrack to go along with it.

With the success of the film at the box office and all the huge merchandise sales that came along with it, Warner Brothers saw dollar signs and wanted to make more. Without hesitation, the studio ordered for another sequel called BATMAN AND ROBIN, continuing where Joel Schumacher and screenwriter Akiva Goldsman left off. However, pre-production notes show that the studio was motivated by nothing but greed rather than the love of the characters. Production was rushed, as Warner Brothers wanted the film out in two years rather than the usual three. Schumacher, knowing that the studio wanted to keep the franchise family friendly, decided to give the film the tone of the popular 1960s TV show - bringing camp, silliness, and cheese to what once was a serious franchise. Mr. Freeze, Poison Ivy, and Bane was announced as the THREE villains for the sequel, as well as adding Batgirl to the already crowded hero side of Batman and Robin. Arnold Schwarzenegger was cast as Mr. Freeze, since Joel Schumacher wouldn't direct the film unless he was a part of it somehow. Uma Thurman was hired as Poison Ivy. Val Kilmer never got a call back to return as Batman, finding out with everyone else that George Clooney was replacing him. Alicia Silverstone was cast as Batgirl due to her role from 1995's CLUELESS. A lot of fans were starting to get worried about the film just through the casting alone.

BATMAN AND ROBIN wasn't helped by the fact that Warner Brothers wanted the toy companies to come in and tell the special effects team, costume designers, and set designers what they wanted to see in the film to sell various merchandise. That's why we get a new Batcave, a new Batmobile, a couple of new costumes, and just a different look to Gotham City in general. The actors were also frustrated by the fact that Schumacher ordered them to act as if they're in a big budgeted cartoon, feeling the product felt more like a toy commercial than an actual film.

Regardless of the issues, BATMAN AND ROBIN managed to make its release date of June 20, 1997, opening at number one at the box office during its opening weekend. Unfortunately, bad word of mouth caused the film's revenue to drop severely the following weeks, making BATMAN AND ROBIN the least successful of the Burton/Schmacher Era both financially and critically. Fifteen years later, the film is still considered one of the worst films ever made, especially in the comic book adaptations genre.

But is BATMAN AND ROBIN as bad as people say? Or is it a misunderstood masterpiece? Gee, what do you think?

PLOT
Batman (George Clooney) and Robin (Chris O'Donnell) are called to stop a robbery initiated by one Mr. Freeze (Arnold Schwarzenegger) - a former scientist who needs diamonds to power up his sub-zero body suit that he must wear due to an accident falling into a cyrogenic vat while attempting to save his sick wife. Although Batman and Robin do their best, Robin's recklessness leads to Mr. Freeze's escape. This continues an already big rift between the two crime fighters over respect and how to handle things on the field.

Meanwhile, a botanist named Dr. Pamela Isley (Uma Thurman) learns that her superior, Dr. Jason Woodrue (John Glover) is using her special plant serum to create a steroid-enhanced beast known as Bane (Jeep Swenson) to sell to the highest bidder. When Isley refuses to help him with his insane project, Woodrue throws toxins on her that should have killed her. Unfortunately for Woodrue, Isley revives as the villainous Poison Ivy, who kills Woodrue with a venomous kiss. She can also use her pheromones to make men fall in love with her.

When Bruce Wayne rejects her proposal that would make Gotham City and the rest of the world into a 'greener' place, Poison Ivy decides to team up with Mr. Freeze to make humanity pay for the cruel treatment to plants, trees, and the environment in general. She convinces Mr. Freeze to freeze civilization so plants can take over the world as they hibernate. Ivy distracts Batman and Robin by using her pheromone dust on them, making both men fall for her - which leads to the two arguing who deserves to be with Poison Ivy - allowing Mr. Freeze to find special diamonds to power up his suit to its maximum level.

Meanwhile, Alfred's (Michael Gough) niece, Barbara Wilson (Alicia Silverstone) shows up at Wayne Manor from England, knowing that Alfred is dying from some incurable disease. While trying to help Alfred [and with his guidance], Barbara figures out the secret of Wayne Manor - finding the Batcave, realizing Batman's and Robin's identities, and learning that Alfred has created a costume for her as well to fight crime. Joining Batman and Robin as Batgirl, the three heroes attempt to stop Freeze's and Ivy's plan from coming to fruition.

REVIEW
I have three words for BATMAN AND ROBIN:

WHAT THE FUCK!?

BATMAN AND ROBIN is still the only BATMAN film [that has been released in my lifetime] I did not watch in theaters. Watching the TV spots before its release, I knew right away that I would not support this piece of comic book shit by buying a movie ticket, instead waiting until cable the following year to check it out for free. The cast didn't appeal to me. The footage that was marketed to audiences looked really ridiculous and terrible. I mean, Alicia Silverstone as Batgirl??? REALLY? There was no one better than her to play the role? I couldn't understand how a once-serious franchise [even BATMAN FOREVER, as silly as it was, had dark, serious moments] turned into such a farce of its former self. BATMAN AND ROBIN feels like a spoof version of BATMAN. The only thing missing was Leslie Neilsen playing The Bookworm or something. While not the worst comic book adaptation out there, BATMAN AND ROBIN is still crap however you look at it.

The biggest culprit of BATMAN AND ROBIN is Akiva Goldsman's screenplay. It's really a miracle how Goldsman went from this to winning an Academy Award for writing 2001's A BEAUTIFUL MIND. You'd think they were written by two different people. This screenplay is atrocious in every way possible. Sure, some things are unintentionally funny. But a Batman movie should NEVER be unintentional, or intentional, comedy. The Animated Series is more adult than this film could ever be. It's just odd and disturbing.

BATMAN AND ROBIN follows a similar template that BATMAN FOREVER used. Batman and Robin are at odds as usual. One character is transformed into the villain, while the other already is. In fact, the villain who transforms was previously a shy, reclusive scientist who wants to use mind control to "better the world" - something Bruce Wayne rejects. Sound familiar? The villains unite to take down the heroes to achieve world domination, or something like that. Batman and Robin get over their problems and take both down easily - with the help of a "teenager" living in Wayne Manor [with a tragic past] who stumbled into the secrets of the mansion to figure out that Bruce Wayne is Batman. It's BATMAN FOREVER all over again, but in a dumber version. The only difference is that Alfred is dying, and we get an extra hero and an extra villain to crowd what's already a shallow script. I won't criticize the superhero template because you don't fix what's not broken. At least I can follow the structure and understand where the film's headed. The blueprint is a BATMAN film all the way, so I can't complain. But it's still pretty lazy.

What I can complain about are the way the characters are handled here. I think Alfred is the only character who seems to not have suffered an INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS, because I don't know who these characters are within BATMAN AND ROBIN. Bruce Wayne/Batman isn't the brooding, dark character he was portrayed as in the first three installments, or in the comic books. Instead, he's smiling all the time. Instead, he's cracking jokes and pulling out credit cards. Schumacher and Goldsman felt that Batman should get over his parent's death and live his life as a rich playboy who fights crime.

.....

DO THEY NOT UNDERSTAND THAT DARK AND BROODING IS WHO BATMAN IS!? HE'S NOT FUCKING SUPERMAN, ASSHOLES!

.....

Sigh. While Batman's portrayal is terrible, he's not the worst character in the film. Robin, who can be a cool character in the hands of someone capable, is just so freakin' annoying here. He complains and whines about everything.

"I want a car! Chicks dig the car!"

"I want you to trust me, Bruce!"

"I can do it on my own, Bruce!"

"You're just jealous that Poison Ivy wants me more than you!"

"I want a Robin Signal!"

I wanted to kick Robin in his protruding codpiece on more than one occasion. I thought he was a sidekick, not a child? The fact that he was more mature in BATMAN FOREVER is boggling, when he was pretty immature in that film as well. But Robin is written in such a way that people will want him dead by the film's end.

Mr. Freeze is also annoying, due to his constant puns and one-liners. But at least his character is pretty faithful compared to the others. His motivations are clear - he wants to save his wife by finding an antidote for her disease. He needs to steal diamonds to power up his suit that keeps him cold - therefore alive. Batman and Robin are in his way, so he wants to take them out. Sure, he does stupid things like have his minions sing for him while he wears fuzzy slippers. He even has two vials with the antidote inside his suit for whatever reason, which Batman gladly takes and uses on Alfred without thinking it could be a trick. Logic? What logic? But at least I know this is Mr. Freeze because the backstory is there and I understand who he is. Out of all the characters in the film not named Alfred, Freeze has the most depth.

I can't say the same for Poison Ivy though. Here's a character who has an interesting comic book backstory and one of the few villains in Batman's rogues gallery that has actual superpowers. Yet, how is she presented here? As a female version of The Riddler, just less funny. She transforms into Poison Ivy within five minutes of her first appearance, never giving us time to know her - like we knew Catwoman and other villains in the franchise. She can kiss men with her kisses, yet she never attempts to do it to a mind-controlled Batman and Robin when they're most vulnerable. The film never lets her grow giant plants that could give our heroes trouble like in the comics. She's just a campy vamp who parades in a sexy costume and seducing men in manners where it never takes the film anywhere substantial. Wasn't this marketed to children? You can't have your cake and eat it too, Warner Brothers! Even her plan with Mr. Freeze is stupid. She wants him to freeze the world so she can make it new again by turning it into a plant wonderland. But as a botanist, wouldn't she know that cold has an ill effect on most plant life? How would this plan benefit her in any way? It just bugged me the moment she comes up with it. No wonder Freeze quickly goes along with it. She's a dumbass!

And Bane...oh poor Bane. What has Goldsman done to you, my roid raged friend? Instead of being presented as the ultra-intelligent villain who strikes fear into Batman [especially after he broke Batman's back in the comics - maybe we'll see that in THE DARK KNIGHT RISES?], he's turned into a buffoon who grunts and does everything Poison Ivy and/or Mr. Freeze tell him. I don't know who this character is. You could have put any Joe Schmoe in his place and it would be the same person. It's really a disgrace what Warner Brothers did to this awesome character in this movie. It's as if they liked his look but didn't bother researching who he was. Honestly, you could have taken Bane out and the film wouldn't have changed all that much [this goes for other characters I have yet to mention]. I think when I first watched this back in 1998, Bane was one of the main reasons why I hate this film. And after seeing what THE DARK KNIGHT RISES is doing with the character, I hate his portrayal even more now.

And then we have Batgirl. One, did this franchise even need Batgirl? Without The Joker around, it was kind of a pointless addition really. It's bad enough Batman has one annoying sidekick. Now he has another one who can interchange with Robin. What's the point? Not only that, but they really butchered her origin here. Instead of making her related to Commissioner Gordon [Barbara's his daughter], they make her Alfred's niece. I guess I can figure out why in context of the film, but it's just silly. The way Bruce responds to her, it's as if Alfred has never mentioned Barbara to him. If they were that close, wouldn't Bruce know about her? And the character really does nothing of note besides steal motorcycles to drag race gang members. At least they got her computer savvy down, but getting 1 out of 5 things right about Batgirl is pretty messed up.

Before I get to Alfred, Commissioner Gordon returns...to do nothing as usual. It's as if only Christopher Nolan understood how to use a pivotal character in the Batman mythology. And we also have Bruce's girlfriend, Julie Madison. While it's great that their relationship is already established once the film starts, this lady does nothing of note at all. Why is she here? What does she do? Is Julie Bruce's trophy girlfriend? Julie and a trophy are pretty one-dimensional, so probably! Honestly, you could have taken both characters out and the film wouldn't change except for its running time. What a waste of space.

As for Alfred, he's not immune to doing ridiculous things in this film. But at least out of all the characters in the film, he still feels the same. In fact, Alfred is the most interesting character in the film because he has the most dramatic moments within this joke of a sequel. He's fighting a disease, yet he never shows his weakness. Barbara thinks he shouldn't be a slave to Bruce, but Alfred clearly loves his job. In fact, Alfred gives Bruce a ton of insight in this film about why he holds on to Batman so much [something to do with Bruce wanting to control death to make up for his parents' murder] and has great moments within the script. In fact, if I were writing this script, I probably would have killed Alfred off - only because it would give Batman some motivation that he clearly lacked in this film. But this is a toy commercial, not a movie. So my logic and insight don't matter, do they?

The only issues I had with Alfred came with Barbara finding the Batcave. It just seems silly that this man would create a data disc that he wanted Barbara to send to his brother - a disc that holds every single secret about Wayne Manor. Why would Alfred do that to Bruce? Does Bruce even know about this? Alfred tells Barbara not to look at the disc, which of course means "LOOK AT IT, YOU NOSY BITCH!" Barbara, of course, looks at the disc. Before she does though, she figures out Alfred's secret computer password: "Peg".

PEG? REALLY? UGH...

Anyway, Barbara enters the Batcave and Alfred has a video in which he does his best Max Headroom impression, telling her that he knew she'd look into the disc and made a costume for her to wear to fight crime. Really, Alfred? It's bad enough you let Vicki Vale into the cave. But this is just stupid. And it makes no sense. Maybe Alfred was going senile, I dunno. But at least he's 80 percent himself in this film.

The dialogue is also an issue here. It's pretty much based on one-liners and puns that get old really fast. It's bad enough that the villains quote them more often than one possibly should. But when you have Batman and Robin doing the same, I just want to pull my hair out. Batman should be brooding and torn, letting his actions do the talking. Mr. Freeze should be cold and dangerous, not clowning around and rehearsing some bad stand-up routine. Poison Ivy should be using her sex appeal in an adult way, not trying out for RuPaul's Drag Race. Did Goldsman even read the comics? Did he even watch the cartoons? Hell, did he even watch BATMAN FOREVER, a film he actually wrote with better dialogue? I understand the studio wanted to sell toys, but didn't the other films sell a ton of merchandise? The reason why BATMAN was so successful is due to its adult, mature, and serious screenplay. Regressing to homage the campy 60s show in 1997 doesn't seem like a logical move. And obviously, audiences agreed.

I will say that the terrible script does make the film more fun than it should be. It's one of those films that belongs on Mystery Science Theater 3000, just so we can hear people riffing on how bad it is. I would love to hear people's opinions on how Batman, Robin, and Batgirl went to the Batcave to change into their black and silver costumes while time was counting down [12 minutes in fact] until the Earth's doom. Some heroes they are. And the heroes never met Mr. Freeze, yet they already had ice skates equipped into their boots. Yeah...sure. It's nowhere near TROLL 2 unintentional comedy, but at least its awfulness never bored me. So I got to give the film that much.

The special effects in BATMAN AND ROBIN aren't the greatest I've seen, but they are a highlight. Unfortunately, all the vehicles in the film look like toys rather than actual transportation. Not surprisingly, the toy companies were the ones who pretty much designed the costumes and the vehicles seen in the film rather than producers of the film itself. I don't think they're all terrible [even though Mr. Freeze's ice car looks pretty dumb], but the Batmobile should not be glowing due to some disco ball where its engine should be. Still, it's better than nothing.

We also get the usual explosions and make-up that looks good. Poison Ivy's pheromones and Mr. Freeze's ice looks okay. The use of green screen was pretty obvious, but it added a charm the film needed. Or maybe I needed it. I can't tell at this point. Still, the effects aren't terrible but I felt some were better in other installments [the film looked cheaper to me for some reason].

Joel Schumacher returned for his second, and last, directorial input on the BATMAN franchise. A lot of people blame Schumacher for how BATMAN AND ROBIN turned out, claiming he murdered the franchise until Christopher Nolan saved it in 2005's BATMAN BEGINS. While I do agree that Schumacher should take some of the blame for the film's failure, I just think he was doing whatever the studio wanted him to do for the most part. Even with all that, I don't think Schumacher's visual style is terrible. It's not as good as BATMAN FOREVER, but this sequel never looks like an eye sore. I will say that the set design of Gotham City looks too structured. I think the colors used here are ridiculous. I think the film feels exactly like its running time, when it should feel shorter. But at least Schumacher keeps the tone consistent for the most part [the dramatic scenes with Alfred do feel out of place with all the comedy around it] and the action is pretty fluid. It just never feels like a film. It feels like a 2-hour commercial for merchandise and silly gags in between. At least I cracked up anytime Batman, Robin, or Batgirl got into costume. Those close ups of butts, crotches, and nipples - hilarious.

I'm glad Schumacher took blame for what happened with this film because he could have put his foot down and tried to make a better film than the final product. And when he finally decided to do that, the next BATMAN project, the planned-to-be-much-darker BATMAN TRIUMPHANT with The Scarecrow as the villain, was canned in favor of a reboot. You live and you learn, I guess. Not the worst direction I've seen in a comic book adaptation, but it's not a highlight in Schumacher's career.

The acting in BATMAN AND ROBIN isn't all that great really. George Clooney tries his best to be a decent Bruce Wayne/Batman. But he's just miscast in the role. He's too smirky and smiley to be Bruce Wayne, even though he plays that better than he does Batman. It's like watching his ER character, Dr. Ross, dress up as Batman for Halloween. Doesn't feel or look right. Chris O'Donnell is pretty annoying as Dick Grayson/Robin. It doesn't help that the script turned his character into a brat. Plus, O'Donnell was frustrated during filming over the new direction, which could explain his performance. Alicia Silverstone is also miscast as Barbara Wilson/Batgirl. She's too bland for the role and doesn't really add much to the film in general.

Arnold Schwarzenegger isn't so bad as Mr. Freeze in my opinion. Should he have been cast in this particular role? Not at all. But at least he seems to be having fun saying those cheesy puns. Plus when he needs to emote, he doesn't do a terrible job. I thought he was one of the better actors in the film, which says a lot about everyone else here. Uma Thurman, who is a great actress, is just terrible as Poison Ivy. She overacts in every scene, overdoing her arm movements and just acting like a caricature of a real person. I know the villain should be a bit hammy in these films, but she sort of teetered the boundaries here. Her performance is pretty painful. Jeep Swenson does nothing but grunt and break stuff as Bane. What more can I say about that?

The only actor who gives a credible performance is Michael Gough as Alfred. The MVP of the Burton/Schumacher Era, Gough gives a sympathetic and passionate performance whenever he's on screen. He has an interesting arc and gives this mess of a film a lot of class. Gough is without a doubt the best part of BATMAN AND ROBIN. While his character is given some questionable actions, Gough makes them all feel important. Too bad this performance wasn't in a better film.

We also get cameos by Vivica A. Fox as Ms. B Haven, Mr. Freeze's assistant, or whoever she was. Jesse "The Body" Ventura and Ralf Moeller are two Arkham Asylum guards. And John Glover gives an okay performance as Dr. Woodrue. It's an interesting cast that needed a much better and tighter screenplay to make it feel more special.

THINGS I'VE LEARNED WHILE TRYING TO CHILL

- Batman and Robin had boots equipped with ice skates to play hockey with Mr. Freeze's minions. If Freeze had done a "Tonya Harding" on each of them, he would have saved me two hours of my life.

- Dr. Woodrue injected a criminal with the Venom super-soldier serum to turn him into the muscular Bane. Word of advice: Don't put "venom" anywhere near your comic book sequel. It'll be bashed for years to come. See also: SPIDER-MAN 3.

- Freeze has his minions sing for him. I have a feeling this boy band will receive a cold reception on the Billboard charts.

- Bruce, Dick, or Alfred knew that Barbara was a secret daredevil. I guess they were the ones who were CLUELESS.

- Batman and Robin feuded over who wins the affections of Poison Ivy. Michelle Bachmann probably smiled at the fact that a woman finally turned Batman and Robin straight.

...Oh. They already were? Okay, if you say so...

- Jesse Ventura played one of the Arkham Asylum guards who has trouble with Mr. Freeze. After watching his two former co-stars in this film, it's no wonder why The Predator pushed his self-destruct button.

- Robin wore rubber lips to counteract Poison Ivy's venomous kisses. I hope they protect against herpes as well, at least in my case. The gonorrhea, however, is another story...

THE FINAL HOWL

BATMAN AND ROBIN is one of the worst comic book adaptations ever made. The script is awful. The direction is passable. The special effects are nothing special. And the acting is a mixed bag. I've only watched it twice and I will be hard pressed to watch it a third time. Is it the worst film out there? Is it the worst comic book related film ever made? No, on both counts. But while it can be unintentionally fun to watch if you don't take it too seriously, BATMAN AND ROBIN is a pretty bad movie that ruined what was a smart and serious comic book franchise. Thankfully this would change in 2005 with BATMAN BEGINS.

As for BATMAN AND ROBIN, I'm sending it to the WTF? Vault where it can hibernate for the rest of time. It can kiss my ass, but it better put on those rubber lips first.

SCORE

1 Howl Outta 4



TRAILER



R. KELLY - "GOTHAM CITY"



JEWEL - "FOOLISH GAMES"



THE SMASHING PUMPKINS - "THE END IS THE BEGINNING IS THE END"



BONE THUGS-N-HARMONY - "LOOK INTO MY EYES"